Maddy Dave
Owners of the universe

Who are you again? Oh yeah, that crazy chick.  

Earlier today I was reflecting upon my high school years (with marked distaste) and I remembered an event which, to this day, pisses me off. Going back three years, we find a younger and more teenage Maddy, and of course a group of friends. I had received a rather clever but at the same time racist text message. It made me chuckle, which very little did (and does), so I decided I’d grace a few of my friends with this joke. “maddy u asshol! How dare u laugh at racism!!!1” I know, I’m such an asshole. Woe to the races out there, for I have belittled you all by sending a fucking text message (which, upon further reflection, was not racist but anti religious). Either way, it rattled someone’s nerves. I was accosted (told off, chastised, screamed at, bitched at) for having been such a racist asshole, and this verbal berating (with decibel levels reaching over 9000) lasted about 2 minutes. That’s right, I pissed someone off so powerfully with a stupid text message which was clever in it’s own way.
What was the reasoning behind this stupid person’s chastisement? I had sent the message to a friend of her friend who had known a person belonging to the religion that I had somehow “made look like it’s worth nothing and it’s people are filthy little grubs feeding off the scraps of society” (I shit you not, those are her words).
HOLY SHIT, I INSULTED SOMEONE WHO KNEW A FRIEND OF MINE! OH JESUS, THE FEDS ARE AFTER ME! HIDE THE FUCKING POT MAN! Fuck off, that’s bullshit. So I told (not made) a little joke. I wonder how many people died from it? Damn, I feel like such a murdering asshole. Slit my wrists and cut my throat, I clearly deserve death (as she said) because I’ve just told a minor joke which, as I was told later, made the person this stupid chick was yelling for laugh.
I don’t get it. What’s wrong with a little joke like that? Is it going to end the world? People these days are way too sensitive. Christ, if I sneeze in public I expect people to start bitching at me for being too loud. Next thing you know, I’ve got a $450 fine for disturbing the peace. People need to eat some seeds and grow some nuts. I see way too many people complaining about minor jokes to feel even safe thinking what I think these days. For Christ’s sake.
Also, to that person who yelled at me… Who the fuck are you to yell at me on behalf of someone who laughed at the joke? Who gave you the right to fight her battles? Hell, that wasn’t even a damn battle, that was (if anything hostile) a “your mother” contest. Admit it, you just wanted a reason to release your nukes of PMS, didn’t you little Ms Bush? (you know who you are). Next time you have a problem with something I’ve sent to someone ELSE, not YOU (essentially, when you feel like butting in on other people's business), please follow these guidelines.
1. shut up and keep it to yourself
2. refer to rule 1
3. refer to rule 1